Schmaltz und Grieben mit Alois, Klaus, Deb und der Lugers

February 2008

02/29/08:

ONLY IN AMERICA (KORPORATE ASSCLOWN EDITION): Interrogation Method for Hardcore al Qaeda Terrorists Used by Utah Firm to Boost Sales

I think the CEO should be waterboarded. Mach schnell!

Posted by Alois on

02/27/08:

QUOTE OF THE DAY: ...[S]tudents are failing to graduate from college because there are too few government-guaranteed student loans. We don't hear that thousands enter public universities without basic reading and mathematical skills—or that their college problems might in part be the fault of their own misplaced priorities in high school, and in part the fault of an educational system that is mostly therapeutic, offering fluffy courses and self-esteem training rather than rigorous math, science, literature and history classes. Nor is there ever mention of teachers' unions, the system of tenure, or a vapid, politically correct curriculum, as explanations why our students are not competitive in the global marketplace.

We also hear that oil prices are sky high and our own automobile industry is failing due to windfall profits and corporate greed, but there's no discussion of the fact that oil-rich autocracies like Russia, Venezuela and the Gulf monarchies have obtained a stranglehold on the global petroleum supply.

For Hillary and Barack, our automobile manufacturing crisis is not the result of uniquely lavish union health and retirement packages for American autoworkers. The government is somehow mostly to blame for Detroit's meltdown and the energy crisis, not Americans' own tastes in the 1990s for large gas-guzzlers and big homes, and their concurrent opposition to nuclear power plants, oil drilling off the coasts and in Alaska, and conservation of resources. — Victor Davis Hanson

Posted by Alois on

MORE ELECTION MADNESS: Yes, Obama's foreign policy makes me wet my pants in fear. I'm just hopeful that the cartoon is correct, and he won't be able to do that which he promises to do, or that once faced with reality as President he'll do the right thing--he's at least SMART enough to recognize what that is anyway (which is more than I can say for his rival Hillary). And truth is, I just don't like McCain, can't bring myself to vote for him, esp. not as a protest vote against a guy who's at least a good guy! Sure, he might turn out to be another Jimmy Carter, I just don't think so.....Jimmah wasn't just a peanut farmer, he was an engineer and (no offense to engineers) they have a tendency to be kinda detail-oriented and in love with redundancy in a way that just isn't appropriate for an Executive in charge of so many details, it's impossible to consider them all, never mind consider making some of them redundant of "fail-safe!" ;)

He's a lawyer, and a good one, and my hope is that--by training--he's not one to take "advice" at face value, even by a loyal supporter or adviser. He strikes me as a guy who'll consider evidence, make sure he can back up his decisions, and will then MAKE SOME. I might not always agree with them, but I don't think they'll be based on his own ego or some blind-faith ideology. Maybe I'm the doe-eyed optimist, but I'm reassured by my friend and co-blogger Steve at Dr. Horsefeathers that he's at least being advised by some reasonably conservative folks on the subject of economics. They may not BE conservatives politically, but their advice near as I can tell from listening to some of them on CNBC is surely far from Robert Reich-style liberal economics (thank the LORD) which is what we'd get from Hillary, and is--near as I can tell--better and more qualified than the folks McCain has in his court (McCain, the guy who admits openly he doesn't know much abut economics. Yikes).

Also, I gotta say, I'm not that convinced McCain would be better on foreign policy. I mean, what if his confidence in his own heroism and past experience makes him Hillary-esque on this issue, you know, so sure of the rightness of what he thinks that he's unwilling to listen to advice from anyone on the other side? What if he takes so much credit for the surge policy (which he seems to love doing) that he refuses to see ways it too might evolve or be modified over time? I mean, he's OLD! As my Dad says, guys his age (my Dad's age too) aren't all that adaptable once their minds are made up, and let's face it, the guy can be a thorny bastard with a temper when that happens. Do we really need grumpy-old-man President just to feel safer? Would we really BE any safer? I just don't know, I wonder if it's more of an illusion than Obama's ability to change anything in D.C., I really do.

But the bottom line is, I'm just unsure enough that anyone can actually DO anything to prevent things from getting worse before they get better--on all fronts--and if there's a reasonable possibility that fumbles along the way would be blamed on the Democrats over the Republicans, so be it! It's not some loyalty to the GOP that motivates me, oh no, they pretty much sicken me at this point. It's that I think the only way for conservatism to have the rebirth it needs is for it to DIE in its current form. It's on life-support as it is, and I kinda feel like a vote for Obama is--in addition to being a vote for those intangibles I mentioned in my blog piece--a kind of DNR for the GOP, one they should have written long ago if you ask me.

Posted by Deb on

5th BLOGOVERSARY WEEK WEDNESDAY WINNER: The almost surreal loveliness of Marilyn Lange once again graces our gatefold... the first woman to do so four times. (I added one extra photo because it's our fifth year.)

Image credits: Playboy Magazine

Posted by Alois on

02/25/08:

DAILY GAAAAAAZ-O-LEEEEEEN! AWARD: Bloggers, fierce new watchdogs of the fourth estate, claim they're democratizing American journalism.

It all sounds great—until you read them. Once you spend some time surfing this ocean of likeminded righties, however, you realize the awful truth: the "populist" blogosphere is cowing the mainstream media even further into submission to the powers that be. — Ted "I Do Too Have a Penis!" Rall

Posted by Alois on

THIS BUD'S FOR DEB: Courtesy of, auf course, Chris Muir.

Posted by Alois on

IMAGE OF THE DAY (posted in "honor" of our latest winter storm, due to arrive any minute now): Drifted snow in Oregon, Wisconsin.

Click for larger image

Image credit: figarocat

Posted by Alois on

I'M VOTING FOR OBAMA COZ HE'S ADORABLE! By Lisa

Yeah, I know, it's probably not the best way to pick a President. But I guess somewhere along the line I just got tired of old white guys that all look like President Cheney [Bret's looking over my shoulder and saying VICE-PRESIDENT CHENEY!!! JESUS, LISA!!!]. Oh, yeah, the President right now is that Bush guy everybody else hates so much but I just sorta ignore.

So anyway, Obama is a total hunk and like you've probably noticed, he's not really even white. I mean, think about it: When's the last time we had a hunk for President? I'll tell you when: It was John F. Kennedy, and he was President back during World War II!

I'd be the first to admit that I don't know much about foreign policy and the economy and stuff, but when Obama speaks it just makes you feel good inside like you're at a Pink concert and she's doing that second encore. You know? Or like when you get five green lights in a row when you're late for your tee time and you know your girlfriends are gonna be pissed!

I forgot who Bret's voting for, except that it won't be Obama coz Bret's straight and he doesn't care if Obama's a hunk! ;=))) For awhile there he was backing that Milt Huckabee until there was something about him being a Bible thumper or a Buddhist or something. But now I hear him talk a lot about this other guy. Paul somebody.

Or maybe it was Ron?

Posted by Lisa on

A MEASURE OF OUR MODESTY: It has to be somewhat serendipitous (in some way that I have yet to figure out) that, on our fifth blogoversary, our comments caught up with our posts. Yup, there are about 2700 of each now. Hey, it ain't LGF... but it's a start!

Posted by Alois on

02/24/08:

FÜNF! You know, it's pretty amazing that we survived to see this day.

That's right, friends... Schmaltz und Grieben is five years old.

I guess we never thought, back in the days when I posted this entry on (gag) Crosswinds.net...

2/24/03:

Congratulations to my Estonian friend Sam Muldia for getting featured on Page 1 of AndrewSullivan.com!

...that our humble little effort would have outlasted the vast majority of blogs on the Blogosphere, even some of the super heavy hitters that used to grace our masthead—including the aforementioned Sullivan (who now seems to have been reduced to a network shill bleating incessantly for gay marriage whilst bankrolling Dhimmicrats).

Hey, we've never really aspired to greatness. We're just three conservatives of fairly different stripes (two in Wisconsin, one in North Carolina) who like to vent our spleens and bring you important news that the MSM doesn't want you to read. And the two of us who are guys like to share our love of beautiful women (and the one of us who is a gal puts up with us, which is really cool because she is like the best blogger around and we actually got her to write for us!) and we can all hate on commies and patchouli-scented assclowns and holier-than-thou liberals and everyone else who wants to destroy America. And that's what this blog has always been about.

And we'd like to thank all of you who have signed on for the ride. This week we're going to have more reminiscing and suchlike, so stay tuned. And I promise you all that I will regale you with the David Letterman number-one reason why I haven't given up blogging.

Oh, and for you students of blog history? Did you really think I was going to forget the dumb-ass S&G birthday cake?

Posted by Alois on