ELEVATING THE TONE OF OUR DISCOURSE: Can it be done? Well, last week I embarked on an experiment to see for myself. I started a discussion/debate forum here in my home state of North Carolina (a "purple" state as it turns out, with heavily blue areas in Charlotte where I live) for women–moms in particular–to discuss hot topics of the day, and I set rules and guidelines telling people how they should act and in spite of some very wrong-headed (IMHO) opinions being tossed about, so far it is working. So far, it seems it is possible to disagree without going for the jugular, and it is possible to do so from the left with correct punctuation and spelling! (Probably the most shocking thing I've learned so far actually....)

But if I thought it would be enough, if I believed seeing my fellow females, my fellow mothers, engaging in civil respectful debate would be enough to restore my faith in the future of our democracy, I was delusional. What I have learned from all this is that no matter how civil or heated the discourse, the fact that our *ideas* are so polar opposite from each other is the problem. We're not talking about differences in implementation of the same policies, or slight variations on how welfare should be delivered, we are talking about radically different world views that touch every single aspect of our lives! What I have learned is that there are people out there who are literally willing to ignore or rewrite history to suit their aims, and that there are people who–when called on that very fact–work hard to JUSTIFY THEIR ACTIONS!

I have encountered women who will–calmly and rationally (we're talking about tone only here)–explain to you that they refuse to even read the account of history that you have put forth because it has a conservative masthead on it. They simply discount it out of hand, like it doesn't count, can't be true, must be propaganda outright. That would be like me tossing out every single thing that has CNN at the top of it as bogus just because it's on their site! I can see being skeptical, that's normal and healthy, but dismissing out of hand every single word, every thought, every fact?? This I don't get. What our schools have done is produce a generation or more of people who think the only information relevant to them is that which supports what they already believe, and the rest is butkus right out of the gate, they know this now without even reading it. How? Because one of their own persuasion told them so.

In short, what I have learned in my brief foray into the minds of liberal women is that the tone of our discourse isn't the key issue, the *substance* of it is. It's not the yelling at each other that's killing us, it's the silence we cultivate when we allow our opinions to define who we are as people.

Posted by Deb on

Comments

[ligneus]

It's funny how some of us, in spite of clear as day evidence to the contrary, still sometimes try to believe that the left is capable of rational thought. Sad and more than a bit scary.

[Peg]

This is why they too are trying to shut down all the good sites on the internet! There is alot of facts and truth out there. On any lefist site, I only see criticism of the sites that are flowing with enriched ideas and facts of the truth! It's those that do not care to even get any facts! They rely on things they hear or are to lazy to find out! Their self centeredness. If they ignore it, it may go away.!
I hate the fact they are trying to rewrite history! That is a NO NO!!!

[Deb]

ligneus, you are so right, and sadly, one of those is ME. I'm like the battered wife who keeps thinking "maybe he's changed..."

So now I keep doing it just to stay aware of what the enemy is up to (or down to, if we're counting brain cells).